“No” Means You’re This Much Closer to a “Yes”

There are not many things in this world that are harder to take than rejection or negative comments. In anything that we do, whether it is business or personal, rejection or negativity toward us can be a quick reversal of positive thinking.

Recently I was online posting an introduction to a forum that included information about my poetry book, “Stepping Stones” and I was confronted by a few people who belonged to the forum. The members who emailed me were upset that I had posted an “Ad” on their forum. I simply replied that I was introducing myself and I cannot formally introduce myself on a poetry forum without speaking of my book and telling people what I do. This is the reason for networking. I am trying to get the word out, in hopes that I may inspire people to improve their own lives.

Anyway, I was shocked that anyone would reply with such a negative outlook on my posting. It was as if I sent them an ad for viagra or online dating. But beyond that, one woman continued by saying that she resented my posting and that true poetry authors look down on vanity or self-published authors. I don’t remember everything that the lady had written, but it did get me thinking.

At first I was sort of outraged by the whole incident, but then I thought to myself, why get upset over it? If I were able to please every single person with my writing, then I would have been on the best sellers list already. In my mind, this was just one more “no” that takes me one step closer to a “yes.” I decided to reply to this message. I told her that I was just introducing myself and that I had to mention my book, because this is me, this is what I am doing, and this is what I believe in. I then finished the message by thanking her for her opinion and sending it off with a God Bless.

I decided at my very first feeling of anger, that I was not going to let this one minor email bother me and slow down my work. Negative feedback is always a hard thing to take, but if you can turn your cheek and possibly take something positive out of the situation, there are many good things that you can learn about yourself in the process. Rejection is part of life. It is best to learn how to deal with it at a young age. But if you have not overcome the feelings of rejection early on, it is not too late to learn how to overcome it. Just remember that a rejection brings you one step closer to a “yes,” and negative comments are only someones opinion. Opinions mean nothing to you, unless they are your own. You can respect other opinions, especially those of your friends and family.

But, always remember: never let someone else dictate your enthusiasm, your belief in yourself, and your will to succeed in whatever it is you choose to do.

Chad A. Armel is the author of the book “Stepping Stones,” a collection of motivational and inspirational poems. Chad is also the founder/editor of myrev.org, a website dedicated to motivating visitors to make a change in their lives.